You Spice Up My Life!!

Is been almost 3 years since 14/7/2005..All this while tis special someone has given me lots of encouragement in life..The care & concern that he shows & the sense of security that he had given me. He has taught me lots of things in life, life would never be the same without him.

How can i describe him??Actually i also don't.. is the special aura that is in him that shines. The confidence, the cockyness and ever so full of himself. Haha. Thats what i like about him. He is a guy who doesnt talk much about his feelings but uses action.

I believe in fate. We started out chatting in IRC. Maybe we would never have met each other or rather know of each other existence. I remember that was my first day chatting in IRC, i thk it has been years i never went in to chat. The one thing about him that catches me ( I mean as a first impression) is that he is not dirty minded. Throughout our conversation, we were enjoying ourselve chatting and it is just purely talking about life and interest. We seems to really connect. I guess we were really carefree, we chatted about anything under the sun.

When he asked for my number i was quite reluctant to give him at first because i never thought of giving strangers or even make friends through the internet. But in the end i give it to him because of his sincerity. I never really treated him as my friend or even thought of i might fall in love with him be his gf. Not even until we met face to face in Tampines Mrt Station. Throughout the entire 3 months plus we been chatting and chatting for several hours like we have live our lifes for thousand years. Im really enjoying myself though.

I remember him coming all the way from his house to my house just to fetch me. He was really sweet to me. I was so surprised that he came but waited for me at the playground to wait for me. I didnt know he came and i was still sleeping at that moment. That was the time, my heart seems to melt a little lol..(i sounded so mushy, remember to put extra blanket for those happen to read my blog lol). Tampines was where our relationship starts.

Though he was not really good looking at the time but is his sincerity that catches my attention and we were quite natural talking to each other. Not with any awkwardness since afterall we met each other thru the internet. Like we have met each other for years.

Though things have changed now with a third party coming in. I still luv him as much. Though i did wavered for while eversince i knw he cheated me going to Thailand with her but i know i still luv him. I know that gal have a friendster but i still cant force myself to hold back not to look at her profile. Whenever i look i would feel upset n try time and again to break up with him. But whenver i asked for a break up he would feel really upset. Though he cried few times n sometime even though he tries to hold back his tears i know he is very upset. I just cant help it baring to leave him all by himself. My heart would melt and ended up patching up again. Because i cant lie to myself that i still luv him.

My Love for him can be so strong that i can oversees his flaws. Enduring everything. I cant totally blame him for this but im also the one at fault too. Time and again trying to break up. I really regretted what i have done, i dunno how it feels like until then when i asked him to break up with me if not i'll be very miserable. I am truly sorry.

Loving him is not a chore to me, i feel really happy deep down when i help him to do things though i protrayed it out that he is very ma fan. Life in this world can be very unfair. I've to shared him with other girl. Time n again sparing thoughts for the girl(knowing that she too luv him) i know how it feels like. But things are really becoming overbearing. I just feel like doing watever i want by just being happy and be with him happily and not care so much.

Let me be the one for this time to care n love him, like i did. Hoping i can be his future wife to be. From now on i'm going to trust him and not anybody else. Loving him unconditionally.

I love the way u hug me..
I love the way you hug me to sleep..
I Love the way u kisses my forehead..
I Love the way u let me fall in ur arms when im upset and cried on ur shoulder.
The patients that u giv me..
All the songs that u sang for me and all the things u shared wif me..I remember.
The laughter that we share..
All the romantic places that we went..

Love him always. Knitting, baking, sewing for him is nv a chore to me. But instead it gives me the sense of satisfaction. I just feel contented and happy whenever i see him happy. Is just worth it no matter wat.